Sunday, September 02, 2012

The Darcy Disposition (or ode to the serious male types)

Ok ladies, I've got a bone to pick with yall.

You all know this guy.

Ah yes, the fabulous Mr. Darcy. And for those of you who (bizarrely) have problems with that one...

There. Now you can relax. 
Anyway moving on. Mr. Darcy. You know him, and most likely you have some manner of affection for him. If you don't, stop reading this and go golfing or play some pool and watch with the boys, because you most likely are not female.
I'm kidding.
My point is, girls like this guy in general. I explain that because I'm nice that way.

But Darcy is not the only hero who is like, well...HIM. There are actually many others of his disposition.

 Mhm, that's right. The dude from the lucky one. Coolness.

I hate to add this one, but I'm in the process of making a point.

 Yeah, him too. Edward Cullen from Twilight. There, THAT kept you from being blinded by sheer awesomeness in this post.
You're welcome.
There are many more guys like this in movies, but it's late and my mind's blanking out on it, so I'll just move on again while you think of them for yourself.

What traits do these guys have in common?
  • Quiet
  • Heroic
  • They're the good guys
  • You don't usually use the word "extremes" in the same week as you say their name
  • Serious
  • Reserved
  • Chivalrous
  • Don't care to say much
  • (with the exception of Edward) happen to have quite dashing good looks
  • women watching their movies LOVE them.
The quiet ones.
The introverts.
The steadies.
The mysterious heroes.
Let's focus on that last point up there. It is a fact universally acknowledged that most females watching these movies will fall in love with these characters. The Edward Cullen tee shirt is everywhere and his hype is just about to start up again. The Lucky One goes without saying. Mr. Darcy is a common household name and all the girls say stuff like "I would so be perfect with Mr. Darcy, I wish there were still guys like him". 

Here's the shocker...THERE ARE.

Shocker number 2: If Mr. Darcy or any of these guys leaped out of the screen in a tee shirt and jeans and showed up at your school, you would have nothing to do with him.
It's true. For most girls.
He would never be popular.
He'd never be "cool"
You would call him "weird", or even better--that horrible, shallow, meaningless word that is so popular to use when you feel uncomfortable for stupid reasons: "awkward".
Off screen, you wouldn't recognize him at all.

I say these things because I've seen it firsthand. I know several guys like this. You see, I even have one.

The guy like Darcy does not care to smile. He does not care to speak all the time. There is a common misconception that, though these quiet types are mostly silent, when they DO speak it is something profound. This is not really true either. Think about it: Mr. Darcy was NOTORIOUS for saying the wrong thing. The Zac Effron guy waited around forever when he couldn't think about how to tell that girl about how he found the picture and all. They come across as socially awkward, shy, even rude. Some guys may be that way, but not these that I'm talking about. They're just not good at talking. That' all there is to it. 
Another misconception is that a steady doesn't have a temper. Not very true either. I mean, did you SEE Mr. Darcy go off on Lizzie that first time he tried to propose? A quiet guy can get mad, and may even holler and raise cain.
But you know what they do?
They listen.

Even when you think they're not, they're listening. And then they think, they process and they retain. 
They do the right thing. That is a common trait they all share. They might not all be rocket scientists who invent the best way to do everything, but that quiet thought goes to something. They are workhorses to get things done and do what needs doing. They're not afraid to get their hands dirty over it. And what they do is RIGHT. They APOLOGIZE when it's not their fault. They want to forgive and forget. Everybody's selfish, but these guys are less so than most people.
 What else do they do? They try for YOU. Yes you, who feel uncomfortable at their presence because they are so serious, and don't have a busload of friends around them at all times. They work on their countenances to be more approachable, since it is friendly to look friendly. They are not perpetually in a bad mood, but being the laughy-jokey happy-go-lucky life of the party is work for them.

And you know what?
I get impatient too sometimes when I would rather talk about something or act without thinking like I should. But I'm learning. I like to think I'm learning pretty well...I have a good teacher. These guys will teach you a lot. I won't make excuses for how you see them, because you don't know them.

So ladies, I do not care if you like these movie guys...but if you do, you had BETTER like them in real life. If it's just because they're hot, there are plenty other hot movie guys. Go like them. But don't say the quiet guys are awesome unless you're willing to chill with the name calling and actually appreciate them.
Cuz I do. 

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